Blu and Raz Berry, Christmas Eve - 2009
Thank you from the bottom of my little angst-ridden heart for following my work and my whining this year. Thank you for your kind words of encouragement, support and advice. They have helped me more than you'll ever know. I've learned so much and look forward to sharing my work and my progress with you all in the New Year.
The fact that you do in fact follow my work is one of the most incredible gifts I've ever received. I remember a time when I excitedly ran downstairs with a completed painting to show a relative what I'd done. I was met with... "You know, we are not here to serve as an audience for your art!" Turns out I don't need them!
It's that time of year again. Happiness is expected. And somehow it always arrives. The sheer excitement of the Christmas Season has stayed with me since I was a little girl, practicing the Christmas morning stair descent with my big bro, weeks before the big day. We thought Christmas was magical and I guess I still do.
This year I've learned so much and I'm so grateful for every lesson. Learning lessons isn't always fun but what would life be without them? Blissful ignorance only works for infants. It's been quite a ride, but in the last decade:
1. I’ve found my spiritual path—or it found me, or it’s always been there and I didn’t remember it, or all of the above—and as a result, every daunting, overwhelming, lingering question I’ve ever had about life, the universe and reality has been, for me, most satisfactorily answered. Yeah...I know....a bold statement. Nevertheless.
2. More often than not, I veer off that path because I think I know better. Happily, the capacity for pain in human beings is high, but it does have its limits. When I’m ready, that path is right there for me and guilt for turning away isn't the price of admission.
3. Liquin is my closest friend right now. After himself and the kids that is.
4. Beginning work on a black canvas is the most significant change I’ve made to date. I’d read it so many places, heard if from so many artists, but never tried it. Obviously, I’m a tad stubborn.
5. The support and generosity of everyone I’ve met online is staggering to me. I’m an isolator. Even more so now that I’m working from home. I will admit to consecutive days in jammies, although not the same pair. That said, in the last five years I have met more people, made more new friends and produced more work than I have in my entire life.
6. Even though we can’t be who our families need us to be or they can’t be who we need them to be, I believe there is a love that prevails and survives everything. Even not interacting.
7. There’s always room in your heart for more love, no matter what you say after your 12-year old Chocolate Lab focused only on the non-physical.
8. I’ve finally accepted that it really isn’t himself’s responsibility to make me happy, successful, safe and secure. That’s my job. Ironically, believing that has enabled him to make me happier than I ever thought possible.
9. I’m hoping something incredibly clever will spring to mind for number nine, but so far it hasn’t.
10. If I don’t respect my work, my work ethic, myself or my environment, nothing much is gonna happen. I am who I believe I am. I accomplish what I believe I can. I’m as successful as I allow myself to be. My reaction to everything I experience is my responsibility and blaming what’s outside for what’s happening inside is an exhaustive waste of time.
Peace, Happy Holidays and again thank you all.