Wednesday, June 13, 2012

MORNING WALK



















 48x36" oil on canvas





"I think a death, or a loss, of someone very close to you, does something to you that you can't get any other way."
                          Andrew Wyeth speaking about the loss of his father N.C. Wyeth


Clearly, I’m no Andrew Wyeth, that’s not my point. This quote could have come from anyone, it was just a nice happenstance that it emanated from the mind of an artist and particularly one that I worship. It meant so much more to me that way.

I watched "The Wyeth's: A Father and His Family" on the the Smithsonian Channel the other night. I was left with a deep sense of longing for a father like N.C. for one thing and an acute sense of how differently things look to me now that Tim is no longer a part of my physical life for another. That said, it occurred to me that this marriage really isn't over, it just exists on two different planes for the time being. That thought makes me smile.

As I mentioned in my last post, painting feels wonderful. I don't feel the need to apologize, agonize or do the "who me?..aw shucks" shuffle.  It is what it is and the results are what they are. They mean nothing in the scheme of things. Nothing is solved by a particularly good painting, nor is anything harmed by a particularly bad one. I'm still me. Tim's still gone. What difference does it make?

And, I want to continue honoring the memory of my very best friend in the world, however I don’t want each post to be a funeral march to the cadence of my lingering sorrow and grief. I don’t want visitors to my blog to be met with yet another installment of my deep sense of loss. I know that Tim wants me to work. He wants me to realize my potential and he wants me to be happy, and I don’t plan on disappointing him.

I began walking the boys two days after Tim passed. We have a rather sizable back yard and had grown far too comfortable just letting them out into the fenced expanse of space to play, do their business and get the exercise they needed. I felt walking was something we could all benefit from, so I bought two turquoise harnesses and began walking them three times a day.

The fresh air and exercise helps the three of us and we look forward to it every day that it doesn't rain. In the hushed silence of the morning, listening to the noises they make, watching their ears flopping up and down and their little cute bottoms sway as they walked, I couldn't help but think it might be a good idea to paint them doing just that, but from the leash point of view.

I bought the largest canvas I've worked on to date - 48x36" from Dick Blick (gotta love that name). Anyway, I've always used the Premier Gallery canvas for my work but decided to try the Premier Heavyweight cotton for the first time. I'm hooked. The paint just settles on the surface so nicely and the finished look is something I've longed for. Who knew?

I'll be taking the camera on our walks now and then and snap away until I get a shot I like. This one really hit that sweet spot inside and I couldn't wait to paint it. I thought I'd spend weeks doing the asphalt but actually spent only about 30 minutes splashing it on and just leaving some of the black painted surface of the canvas to explain the road texture. I have a few more details to iron out and some shadow and highlight to fix but that's about it.

I think Tim is pleased. With both the painting and my not putting all of my sense-of-self eggs into one ability-to-paint basket.

Thank you again for your caring, support, words of comfort and interest in my work. I'm very fortunate to have so many wonderful friends.

43 comments:

  1. Great work, Suzanne -- both the mental and the artistic. Thanks for sharing.

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  2. Suzanne..... you are TRULY somethin' else !! Welcome back to painting !! your public has been waiting for you ! We all missed you....

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  3. This is amazing, Suzanne.I don't know what attracts me the most in it,its just the total effect of this artwork...you are gifted; and you have to work more and more.I understand that sometimes everything may look 'futile' to you, but take my word, you are doing a great service to the world by way of painting.Your work spreads a warmth, happiness- it makes me break into a happy smile- and I guess that's what we all need the most!Keep up the good work.

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  4. I love this painting and this post Suzanne. ☺ You are an inspiration on may levels! Thanks!!

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  5. LOVE the pups! And the size. And your ability to make it all look so darned easy! :)

    Its good to find a canvas that helps the process and showcases the final piece. Sometimes you have to kiss a lot of frogs to find it. Me? I'm still kissing frogs...

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  6. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings and of course you beautiful painting. I especially love the perspective, it feels very intimate. And optimistic, as one can almost feel the boys pulling us along. Moving forward.

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  7. I love to read your thoughts and how well you put them into words. Life is a long learning process which never ends and I feel that you are learning just to be and to paint, the self doubt and criticism seems to have melted away.
    Wow what a large canvas you used, I like the composition and of course the boys are beautifully portrayed, you are a brave and wonderful lady and I know you are on the right path.

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  8. This is a wonderful painting! I particularly admire the composition, it's so unique and effective, with the dogs on the side of me as I look into the painting, and the leash leading my eye up to them, the shadow trailing behind them... I'm so glad that you are painting!

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  9. I love these boys, Suzanne!!! They are adorable ..even at this angle!! LOL I'm going to try the premium heavyweight canvas..thanks for the tip....I'm still green so I need advice!! Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us..you are such an incredible lady who I admire so much! Your strength will help you move forward..step by step!! We will always be here to help you through this. Painting will be SO helpful...

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  10. Your love for these guys really shows. They look so proud and sure. Just keep leaning on them and they will lead you where you need to go. Another wonderful painting.

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  11. It's the boys!!! You'd think I would have spotted this in Brooklyn by now, but I don't remember seeing a joint lease like yours, and it's really cute in turquoise too. What a great painting and perspective!

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  12. Gunkie, your painting of Raz and Blu is perfect! What more needs to be said?

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  13. This is fabulous, Suzanne. A serious eye catching want to take another long look painting. Great composition and a familiar perspective for me! I only wish I was creative enough and came up with the idea of a painting like this first. I LOVE those little behinds, don't they always walk with some important mission ahead? This is a treasure, as are the little furballs themselves.....

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  14. Hi Suz.
    This painting of your boys is a Masterpiece! You have captured every little wiggle and tug on the harness! I also can hear the little nose noises, just as you mentioned. They sound just like me! Where are they taking you? What are they thinking? Ohhh wonders! Ohhh lets listen to the birds, and sniff over here.
    This painting needs to be displayed,,, because it makes us feel good! And there is nothing cuter than little puggie behinds!
    We love, love , love this masterpiece!
    I also love your freedom with expressing your words and feelings. I want to be like you someday.
    And oh yes,,, Tim is very proud of YOU and this painting of the boys,- we know it!
    love
    tweedles

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  15. Love your guys, they are terrific, Suz!

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  16. Well I love the way you have thought so outside the box here with your chosen perspective! It turns it in to something quirky, different and eye-catching! The light singing out from that shadow is amazing! Just LOVE it. And what a great post :0)

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  17. I'm not sure why but this is a favorite, Suz. Raz and Blu are so crisp and sharp, the turquoise harnesses a beautiful complement. I never ever mind hearing you talk of Tim, Suz. I will never tell you time heals, never think you need to move on. I believe that love you two shared has made you whole and will always be a big part of who you are. Embrace it! I've said it before and I'll say it again. Tim is and always be with you.

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  18. love this suzanne !!!... can see a whole series of you walking them.

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  19. Oh Suz, these little guys of yours are the perfect subject! Wonderful job. I feel like I was on your walk with you! Painting your passion, it's always the best choice.

    It's ok if you tell us your sad. It wouldn't be normal if you weren't. Wyeth's quote is so true...

    Keep painting girl! Your work is beautiful and real.

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  20. Suz, I would know your paintings ANYwhere. I don't know if I have the words to explain why...or if I even need to. They just stand out among the rest.
    You shine.
    Bren

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  21. I love this perspective Suzanne. And the way the leash turns coming off the canvas is excellent! Their harness colour is the perfect compliment - beautiful fresh piece all around : )

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  22. My first time to your blog though I have enjoyed your work for a while. I love this, the colors and the composition are wonderful. Also I am so sorry for your loss, I can tell by your posts he was the love of your life and my heart aches for you.

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  23. awesome work...love the way you have composed your work!

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  24. This is such a fun painting... as so much of your work is. I love the sense of the dogs straining on the leash to make you (and us as viewers) go faster and farther.

    N.C. is a favorite for me. I was surprised and pleased to see one of his original paintings just a few days ago when we were driving through South Dakota, at the preeminent Wall Drug, of all places. The dining room features "the largest privately owned western and illustration art collection in the country".

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  25. I love this painting so much Suzanne. :)) I was reading through the comments and I don't know what I could add because I feel exactly the same way. I will say tht I LOVE how you left the asphalt suggested (and that it was quick for you BONUS!!), and the perspective of you looking down on those sweet little puggies is so awesome. I just stared at this painting for a really long time and I think I could keep staring even longer. It's beautiful.

    I thoguht I had commented on this but just realized I hadn't. My computer was down earlier this week so I must have just read your post on my mobile without commenting. Tis hard to leave an epic message with a touch screen!! lol. *hugs* to you Suze. :))

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  26. Preciosas acuarelas, muy realistas... me quedo.
    Saludos.

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  27. It is absolutely fantastic! I love the composition, the perspective, the way you let the black show through giving texture to the road, the blue harness, the bit of white in the top left corner showing the line on the road... basically what I am trying to say is I love everything about it!!!

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  28. Suzanne, this is stunning. Amazing! Thanks for sharing this and your story. Blessings!

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  29. I saw this painting on Facebook and absolutely loved it. It's unique and extremely well painted. I also enjoy your openness and candor and hope you find any way possible to continue on your artistic journey.

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  30. I feel as though I'm on the walk with them (and their extremely cute little bottoms).
    Andrew Wyeth had a way with words as well as a way with the brush. He will always be an inspiration for me.

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  31. Love the perspective in this. Cute little dogs! We visited NC Wyeth's house/studio recently and the Brandywine Museum. It was a great experience. Love that you tried something new and BIG! Blessings Suzanne.

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  32. Hi Suzanne, Just stopping by to make sure all is well. Hope your day is good you are still in my thoughts and prayers.

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  33. I really like this view of walking the dogs. It's very refreshing.

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  34. First of all- the painting is fantastic! I also find walking my dog therapeutic- does more for me than for her!

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  35. Hope you're doing well my friend. This painting is just beautiful! It's a snapshot of your life at the moment. Such a fabulous perspective! Wishing you and Blu and Raz happiness!!!

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  36. Interesting, quote from Andrew Wyeth......but maybe you wouldn't want to get that.......
    I do love this painting. It's a total winner.
    I imagine that each day is different for you and I just want to tell you that I think of you, Suzanne. Hope there are moments of joy in your days.

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  37. Oh darn, I think my comment disappeared :(
    Just wanted you to know that I think of you, Suzanne...

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  38. So what happens after you paint the best painting you ever painted? ;) Amazing you captured this moment on film and then were able to paint it! I have some glimpses and flickers of memories of moments I would have loved to capture in film and then canvas.

    Hurray for you!

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  39. Dear Suzanne, how are you? you know i frequently visit your blog and your wonderful paintings are great sources of inspiration for me:) i hope everything is well, take care, see you:)

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  40. I thought I commented on this 2 MONTHS ago (but it was on my iPad, and I was struggling, so maybe I messed up)! I am in love, love, love with this painting. Don't be a silly about trying not to mention Tim on your blogposts - his passing was seismic in your life! Don't try to edit that grief for US! OK, now that I've gotten that out I want to say that you now have convinced me to spring for the heavy duty cotton Premier from Blick. (yes, I've always grinned at the name, too). But seriously, Suz, this painting would look fabulous on a carpet back. You are just that good. xo

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  41. Suzanne, when I read that Wyeth quote I think..yeah, that's true but I could have done without. Sigh.
    I Think of you often.
    This is one of the most beautiful paintings I've ever seen.

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  42. Suzanne, it's been a month. Time for you to return to us, I think? Unless you don't want to - then do what you must, dear one. Remember there are many thinking of you :)

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  43. Fant√°stico trabajo,me encantan los carlinos :)

    Enhorabuena!

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Your visits to my blog and the comments you leave here are an integral part of my creative process. They are helpful, supportive and well, let's face it, they feel really good! If I don't thank you personally, please allow me to thank you in advance for taking the time to stop by and leave your thoughts, they mean so much!