Friday, August 13, 2010
oil on canvas
This is Bean. He's not an Ewok. I checked. He's a commission I just completed. I think.
The revamp continues. This week, it's been an exceedingly sobering experience. All this started as my somewhat light-hearted effort to re-arrange my life in an orderly, grown up fashion, clearing out the clutter, start behaving like a professional. This week it became painfully clear that I have a problem. A big one. I had a moment of clarity I think they call it. I saw for the first time in my life just how much crap I've accumulated...and I'm only working on my store room.
This is my very first before and after photo. The big difference this time is that I'm not stuffing things away so it looks neat, I'm actually getting rid of it all. The living room is the unfortunate repository of what used to be here while I sort, donate and toss out. Happily, the Lupus Foundation picks up donations right off the front porch. I found boxes of canvasses I'd ordered and forgotten. It was like going shopping in my own home! This room is now organized in a very efficient manner. I'll never add anything unless there is a place for it. I'm thrilled and can't wait to branch out to other areas of the house.
As I filled bag after endless bag with books, magazines, action figures and the like, I became hopelessly overwhelmed and just sat down and had myself a real good cleansing cry. I didn't know! I didn't see! Just who the hell did all this? Apparently that "hoarder" joke I made at the outset is on me. On a sliding scale of one to ten, I'm quickly approaching a solid eight! Just thinking about the amount of things stuffed into closets and the garage is mind boggling.
I thought I was ok. You know, occasionally I spent too much on things we didn't need. I knew I mood altered with shopping. I didn't know I mood altered with clutter as well. Although I feel badly for wasting our money and stuffing our home with useless things, I'm grateful for whatever caused me to finally see the problem for what it is. Himself is beside himself with joy that I've finally seen the light. He offered to help, but I think the best therapy is to handle every single piece of poop I've collected. This way, I'll reflect a tad more on any possible purchase before bringing it home to add to the existing chaos.
Thank you everyone for your wonderfuly supportive comments! They've helped me so much! I don't feel like I'm alone in the wilderness of clutter. And the suggestions have helped so much. Each time himself sparks up the grill an entire box of bank statements and credit card solicitations do their part to get the coals a glowin'! And I also appreciate the suggestions on how to thank everyone for stopping by and leaving comments. I'm giving myself a block of time each day, starting Monday, to catch up on what everyone has been doing, I've missed so much.
Thank you again and enjoy the weekend.