It's been a while. My apologies, I hit quite the little grief bubble there for a bit. Plus the Dread Mahockiss reared it's ugly head again and I was stripped of any creative ability whatsoever for a week or so. If you've been a follower, you'll recall that the Dread Mahockiss is the name I've given to those stretches of time when one feels abandoned by their muse, has completely forgotten what to do with a paintbrush and avoids even being in the same vicinity of a blank canvas.
Funny, I thought all that nonsense would be a non-issue after losing Tim. It took a while but it's back. Yes, I know it's all in my head and my choice and I should ignore it and was sure I would when and if it reappeared...but... Not!
I'm sure it's a reaction to the new studio, showing up for work each day on time and staying until quittin' time. I think I needed to miss working again if that makes any sense. Whatever, not going to spend a lot of time whining about it. What? Oh...too late! Sorry.
I found this in the store room, half finished. I remember trying to paint alla prima on board and post the same day and I also remember the state that little exercise put me in. What a brat! I'm still not feelin the surface, at all, but it's done. Guess I'm still in a mood, I'm not happy with it, but then that's normal for me.
If I sound a little pathetic I apologize. Spent the second of what will probably be more than a few wedding anniversaries, without himself. It. Sucked. Big. Time. But I had wine and a lovely conversation with him. I must say, I'm still not used to him being this quiet!
But, that said, still I know I have so very much to be grateful for. Our time together was magical and will be again. The boys are just incredible and so much company and I've made so many new friends, here and online. And I want to keep myself a vibrational match to all the good things I imagine, so I climbed out of the pity pot and am on solid ground again.
I hope everyone is well and enjoying the beginning of summer.
Happy Anniversary Northport! You are loved and missed so very much.