MOSES BOTKIN CHALLENGE September

"The Lady's Dark Journey"
5x7" oil on linen

Not my best effort but it's done. This was hard. Diana chose this month's theme..an all black composition to follow last month's all white, and I must say, I was stuck. Obviously, I fell back on a familiar reference, the bunched up cloth solution, but felt I had to add something so I took some advice I've gotten over the years from you guys, and added a bug! It's red but I just couldn't think of anything black to put there except maybe a string of black pearls, however I'm not in possession of any so, lady bug time.

And, it was a tad difficult painting on a smaller canvas because I've been painting so large lately. Sure did go quickly though.

I'm sorry to report that the new brushes I gushed about didn't last long. The ends are going in all different directions after only 3 washes, but I will say that I like the way they feel and will continue to use them. Like anything in this world, if you produce a permanent solution to the problem, there will be no reason to buy new, and we can't have that now can we?

It's coming around Tim's birthday, October 1st, and I'm hitting some rough patches. It's okay though, it's called grieving and it will go on for quite some time, so I will be kinder and more patient with myself. We had promised each other, that if one of us should leave early for some reason, the other would follow closely behind. And since I'm still walking around and actually living a life that I enjoy more often than not, I think I'm doing okay and that Tim is proud of me for that. Although, I must say, I'm looking forward to seeing him as soon as I possibly can, but in the mean time I have so very much to be grateful for, including each and every one of you who visit my blog, leave comments and send messages of support and hope from time to time. And again, I thank you for that from the bottom of my heart!

Enjoy:

 "Shades of Black"

 original oil  6x6"© 2013 Diana Moses Botkin
http://dianamosesbotkin.blogspot.com/

"Black...A Study"
12x16" oil on linen
© V.N. Ross

A VERY BIG FLOWER

"Peony"
30x30" oil on heavyweight canvas
 SOLD

I've never painted a flower. Leaves yes, but not a flower. I've always wanted to, but just couldn't seem to snap the right photo of one. There are hundreds in my file, you'd think I'd find one that hit the sweet spot. But no. Heavy sigh. So it was off to a stock site to make a purchase. Glad I gave in, it was fun.

This really isn't finished, it's one of those paintings that could go on forever, but I decided to call it because, not to break form, I'm way behind.

I've found that pre-mixing my palette really helps my flow, as I've mentioned. I would always run out of what I needed and now I don't! Plus, I realized that taking the paint out of the plastic container and putting it onto the palette paper was a wasted step, so now it's out of the freezer and onto the tray, still nestled in their little plastic homes. I loved this selection of colors, it looks like sherbert.

I also discovered that I have been growing as an artist! Who knew? Back in the day, I would have painted each one of those curly french fries in the center, one by one—shadow, mid tone and highlight! Instead, I found the darkest shade and splashed that in and then when that was dry I picked out the shapes with lighter shades.

I've included the scale shot even though this canvas is much smaller than the ones that I've been working on of late, but still rather large for a single bloom. I'm really hooked on Blick's Heavyweight pre-stretched. They just feel so substantial and the paint just seems to glide on.

Also, I found some great brushes there as well. I've written before about trying to extend the life of my brushes but basically, if you use them, they deteriorate. These new Princeton Catalyst Polytip Brushes seem to be just what I've been looking for. They feel wonderful on the canvas and clean up doesn't seem to be disturbing their 'do! Nice. We'll see.

I cannot believe that summer is almost over! My second summer without Tim physically here was strange. Last year, I guess I was still in shock, plus there was construction going on most of the time. The confusion and distractions helped. This summer however, it was left to me to keep myself busy and out of the pity pot.

I failed these last few weeks but that's cool. The good news is that I feel him here all the time and have embraced the reality of his presence more often than not. Sometimes though, it's back to the "real" world and the emptiness and silence. But it doesn't last long. I realize there is nothing to be sad about. He's much happier, in fact he's perfect and he's here! Where's the problem? Yeah, I know it needs work. But, it's a choice. Reach for the good feelings, the bad ones don't serve any purpose that I can see.

After I snapped the scale shot I turned to look for something on the table and there, underneath was my cheering section and support system. Raz and Blu Berry! Pure perfection.

Sometimes they seem to be interacting with someone that I cannot see. Gee... I wonder who that could be?

Thank you for stopping by, your support and comments continue to help me grow.

MOSES BOTKIN CHALLENGE August

"Eggs 2"
36x48" oil on heavyweight canvas

Yet another protein-packed canvas! Thought I'd be painting eggs for a stretch but I'm done for a bit after this I think. Too much protein isn't good for me!

My challenge choice turn came round and I chose an all white composition as this month's subject. This set up, believe it or not, is of 9 white eggs in a white bowl on a white background, but as you can see there was very little in the way of white to paint...which is after all, what attracted me to an all white challenge! The lessons in value and temperature are many.

I took this reference shot when I did my extensive egg photo shoot with the double yolks. When I suggested the all white challenge I'm sure I had this in mind. Taken from above, I loved the shot; it was graphic and had an element of abstract design that I thought would be so much fun to paint! It wasn't though, surprisingly enough. It did become a tad tedious. It's not completed, but I need a break and will put it away for another day. I think it's close enough to call though.

I had a hell of a time with the bowl and the eggs. I wanted smoother transitions from shadow to light but it just became splotchy. I feel a little betrayed by my larger Home Depot brushes. But, who cares? I worked, I was present, focused and involved. That is what's most important. And even if I'm disappointed in the outcome, handling that with emotional maturity is another part of the lesson. I don't know how many paintings I've abandoned only to find them years later and wonder what my problem was. I think, with this one though, I missed the color!

Here's the scale shot, juxtaposed fittingly next to their cracked cousins. Again, thanks to Bren for the scale suggestion!

Quite surprisingly, there were, evident in the reference shot, shades of burnt sienna! Where, I wondered, could this color be coming from? Then I realized that it only showed up on the bottom of the eggs. They're snuggled up in one of those 21st Century bowls that are attractive but fairly useless. You know the ones I mean. The huge, oddly-shaped dishware that holds very little in the way of food but look really amazing with a handful of micro greens and one big shrimp!

This is one of those bowls. The front end is about two inches in depth and the top end is about eight, so the eggs settled toward the front end and gravity affected the yolks, the double yolks I should say, which made themselves known through the thin shell with that touch of burnt sienna.  I guess. I can't imagine how white eggs in a white bowl would suddenly sprout a warm glow of sienna through their shells otherwise.

I hope the summer is going well for you all. And I wouldn't dream of closing this post without uttering just two more words...Tim Berry. Whew! There, thanks, I feel much much betta!

Oh, yeah, I almost forgot...if you have any interest in joining our happy group, please email Diana at diana@dianamosesbotkin.com.

 Please enjoy these wonderful all-white compositions from the group:

"Study in White"
16 x 12" pastel
©V.N. Ross

"Basic White"
8 x 6" oil on canvas"
©2013 Diana Moses Botkin

ZHEN-ZHEN

Zhen-Zhen
20x20" oil on linen
NFS

Meet Zhen-Zhen! She's a Chinese Crested and a donation portrait. This is my first dance with this breed and did I have a field day with her flowing locks! And the bi-colored eyes! Shades of David Bowie! I thought I'd have trouble with her but a pooch is a pooch and I dearly love all pooches so once I got going I had a great time. I hope her pet parents are pleased.

Also, I thought I'd post a scale example of the as yet unfinished "Sparrow's Ass" or the asparagus as they are identified by most normal folk. I found that the paints don't last more than a month and a half in the freezer so when I get back on this I'll have to remix, which might be a good thing, we'll see.

Okay, I'll admit that I can't think of a clever way to segue into a Tim tale so I'll just dive right in if you don't mind.

A few months ago I received an email from a friend of Tim's who is a member of the band "Blow Up Hollywood." They're on Wikipedia! Anyway, Steve, Tim's friend was so very caring when Tim first left and called to check up on me periodically to see how I was doing which I really appreciated.

The email offered band merchandise and an opportunity to support them in their efforts. He was really kind and explained that if I wasn't interested he would certainly understand. I made a mental note (not a good idea for me) to indeed log on and make a donation but, unfortunately, all but forgot about it until...

About 2 weeks later I was sitting in the back yard and suddenly the email popped into my head and I felt compelled to go to the computer and do as I'd promised. I found the email, clicked on the link and took the appropriate steps.

Later that day I received an email from Steve thanking me for my donation and asking how I was doing. He then went on to say that something strange had occurred and he had no idea what to make of it.

He went on to explain that the night before he had been dreaming about something completely unrelated when suddenly Tim appeared out of nowhere in his dream! He said it was vivid and Tim looked great and was happy and they had a nice chat but avoided any reference to his passing. When he woke up and remembered seeing Tim he was surprised as he hadn't thought about his friend in a while but didn't think anything of it until...

he logged on and saw a donation had been made in Tim Berry's name! A coincidence? I think not! You can imagine how good this "sighting" and coinciding donation made me feel. You are too cool Berry!

Thanks so much for dropping by, I so appreciate your comments, thoughts and support. Happy creating!

MOSES BOTKIN CHALLENGE July

"Seeing Double"
48x36" oil on heavyweight canvas


Well this month's challenge subject should be fairly obvious at this point. I love painting eggs. In the shell, out of the shell, cooked, raw...there's just so much going on at any given time with eggs, vibrant colors, the googlies, almost as if half of the sun was (should that be were or was?) encased in clear liquid.

There's this great gourmet market a bit up the road that I just haunt. Amazing collection of treats, both savory and sweet. They carry eggs with double yolks and when I discovered Vicki's choice for this month, those yummy double yolks popped right into my mind. I set up a photo shoot and snapped over 50 shots so there will definitely be some protein-laden canvases in my future. And, for some reason, I feel as though I need to paint everything on large supports here lately!

I decided not to rush into the painting and did some thinking and even with that I had to begin over again having started working on a lighter cotton canvas with far too much play in the surface. A very unique thing happened during this process. It dawned on me that far larger brushes might be a big help and they were! Who knew? I went to Home Depot and purchased the regular brushes one would use to paint the wall and they worked perfectly.

I would normally start by looking at my reference and try to capture the deep reddish orange and nearly white highlights in one session but since the previous few paintings have fared well with layering I thought it best not to futz with the streak.

I painted the predominate color with lots of Liquin so the next day I could paint the next layer and so on for three days. I actually finished on time!

Also, a dear friend, Brenda Ferguson (I love her work) suggested that I include a snap showing the scale of the canvas in real life. Thanks Bren, great idea!

There's a feeling of fullness, of working on 3 different challenges, commissions, mentoring and donation work all at the same time. My head hits the pillow and I'm feeling satisfied because there are paintings waiting for me when I get up the next day. Tim you were so right. Working really, really helps. Repeating myself, I know. And speaking of himself, what would a post be without including Tim?

Sitting out reading a book last week before it got oppressively hot, I saw a rather large crow perched on a branch nearby. He was incredibly loud, cawing and cawing, when suddenly he began making this soothing clucking sound. He stayed there for the duration of my reading session making that soothing sound. Once or twice I looked up, laughed out loud and asked him if he was Tim. He was there when I went back inside, having stayed on that branch cooing sweetly for an hour and a half! The next morning when I took the boys out into the back for their morning toilette, I found a big black feather right in front of the door. Now me being me, it was validation that Tim did indeed join me while I read. A more rational person would pronounce the crow annoying and ignore the feather, however, clearly, I'm not rational and for that I am so grateful.

That said, please enjoy the Egg Specials of the day:

"Imposter"
Original drawing on paper
Approx. 7.5 x 9"
©2013 Diana Moses Botkin
http://dianamosesbotkin.blogspot.com/

"Dusk Flip"
12 x 16" pastel
©V.N. Ross

SELF PORTRAIT

Suz"
14x14" oil on heavyweight canvas

Well I did it and since I approached it as an adult it worked out okay! Besides, it's just a face. That it happens to be mine makes it difficult to see it that way however, no matter how grown up I try to be.

But the face comes with a story. I painted myself as joyful because joy is my daily goal and how I've decided to tell my story. I saw all sorts of images in my head given the portrait assignment for the group Artists Growing Together was to convey how we perceive ourselves and what our life experience has been. And, I would like to say that choosing a smiling pose was due completely to my new outlook on life, but sadly, no. The shots taken with sadness and loss etched on my features really showed my age. (Hmmm...vain much Suz?) That said I'd like to offer a tip to aging hippies and baby boomers out there. Smile. A lot!

It doesn't read in the photo of the painting, but there's a bright light over my right shoulder, and I'm sure I don't have to tell you who it represents. Himself is present and accounted for! Tim is with me, always. I know this because I can't fake feeling good.

I originally saw myself standing in front of a window, the light falling on my features showing a reflective, distant gaze painted in strong dark hues and bold strokes. But that's not what I feel, how I look or how I paint. I thought it would be cooler than just a smiling face but I don't want my story to be tragic, sad or difficult. I read that we don't live the life we deserve, we live the life we think we deserve and I think I deserve to be joyful.  And I know Tim wouldn't have it any other way.

MENTORING

"Us Three"
11x14" oil on heavyweight canvas

SOLD

 About two months ago, I received a very complimentary and eloquent email from a young artist named Melissa Adams. She was very sweet and asked me if I would be interested in mentoring her. My initial reactions was the usual "aw shucks...who me?" shuffle but she added a thought to her email that I found very intriguing. She said, and I'm paraphrasing..."I believe that we can both learn from the experience."

Hmmm. I'd been thinking that I wanted to branch out and get involved in things online and here was the perfect opportunity. The problem is I'm not a huge fan of critiquing! We are just in the first blush of mentor/mentoree interaction so time will tell how it works out, but so far, I'm pumped and enjoying our chats very much. I'm thinking and working more and that can't be a bad thing!

The painting above is our first project/challenge together. I decided to actually paint in layers. I put down the basic colors and built up my layers over three days. Plus I premix the colors and put them in the freezer (thank you for that tip), so when I'm ready to start, everything is right there and ready.

Melissa also asked if I would like to join a group of artists in a joint blog entitled..."Artists Growing Together". I did, and I'm feelin the love. Our first challenge is the dreaded self-portrait. Arrrrrrghhhh! However, in the spirit of being a grown up and doing grown up things, I decided to stop being silly and relate to my face as if it were....well...a face!

Recently, I got all tarted up for dinner out with friends and I thought since I cleaned up, did the hair etc. it might be nice to see how the aging process is going so I took some iPad snaps.

The aging isn't going as well as I'd hoped but the snaps were tolerable. I chose one and begin it tomorrow. It's due on the 7th. We'll see.

Oh, yeah, I've been meaning to share a little situation that I experienced a few months ago. Losing my wallet is a hot button issue for me. I'm sure no one likes to lose their wallet, but for me it's instant panic city. I freak out! During our first few years together, Tim went from understanding, patient, and supportive to "Dude, you're on your own!" Admittedly, my reaction to the missing possession was over the top. Really. Over. The. Top.

So when I'd gone to my favorite market and driven home listening to some great tunes, all calm and looking forward to relaxing with a good book and a glass of wine, it was quite distressing to slide my hand in my pocket to put my wallet away and find it empty!

Panic ensued. I phoned the store I'd just left to see if anyone turned it in. I combed the car, the grocery bags, the garage floor and every pocket I had. Nothing! I hopped in the car and drove up to the market like a madwoman, hugging the rear end of the car in front of me. See, like I said...over the top. Of course when I arrived and retraced my steps there was no wallet to be found. I went into the market and inquired again, but it wasn't turned in.

At that point I began hearing echos of Tim's common sense filter through my panic and fear....everything can be replaced, it's fine...and I began to calm down. My stomach dropped when I remembered I kept emergency money in there and thought...oh well, I hope whoever found it needs it more than I do. I decided to go straight to my bank, cancel my debit card and get a new one.

Luckily they know me there so replacing my card without a license was possible but took some time. When the teller handed me my shiny new debit card, I was coming back to feeling normal and I felt Tim would be proud of me for not getting depressed and heavy sighing all day. Back in the car I heaved a sigh..but of relief and laughed to myself...dude, you survived losing Tim...this is just a wallet!

As I pulled into the drive I noticed the mat on the front porch was raised up and thought, oh goody, the books I ordered from Amazon arrived. I put the car in the garage and came in through the studio and went straight to the front door to see what had come. When I lifted the mat up there was my wallet with all the money and everything still in it!!! It felt like a dream! Sweet relief! I was astounded!

The gentleman who returned it called later that day to make sure I'd found it and to see if I was indeed the owner of said wallet. I thanked him profusely and was so very grateful.

There are some really wonderful people in the world. Still.

Also, thank you SO VERY MUCH for all of the wonderful comments on the Sparrows Ass (asparagus)!There's nothing like getting a great response to a painting in progress you're not sure works! My thank-yous are on their way!